It’s ok to delete stuff – what I really wanted to say

So even after all this time, I find myself censoring my words as to not say anything that might be hurtful to other people who didn’t give me the same courtesy.  With that in mind, here is what I really wanted to say:

So, Hi.  My name is Jennifer and I’m a digital pack rat.  I keep like every picture I’ve ever taken – like even the ones I took in burst mode and have 17 identical copies of the same blurry picture because I think that I’m going to find something magical hiding in them and I don’t want to miss it.  Truth, there is not much magical in the side of the road. 

Tonight, I did something very scary.  I deleted pictures that I took when I was with Steve.  The duplicates, the blurry ones, the ones of him sleeping with the cat, dog, Bailey, you get the point, the ones I took and meant to do something with from all those trips I took like 5 and 6 years ago in the semi that now just remind me of what is gone and kind of make me angry.  All gone.  I know that reading this might be causing you great panic, but take a deep breath – it’s ok.  I checked with my friend Jenny first because I didn’t want to wake up 5 years from now and regret deleting all those pictures, so I checked with someone who had let go before as well.

The majority of the pictures I took were not only of different places, but of a different time and they don’t hold great memories anymore because they were all from when we first started dated and I thought I was going to love him forever and we were seeing the World together so that made each place special at the time but now, they are just taking up room on a memory card now and remind me of something that is over.  They no longer hold the same nostalgic spell over me they once did because the spell has been long broken and to be honest, most of them were crap anyways.  I kept copies of the pictures I really loved, my nephew as a baby, Jonas as a 4 year old trying on my frog slippers with a goofy grin, the Gulf of Mexico, my solo trip, my friends – I think you get the point.

But here’s the thing, the pictures are just one of the many of the things that I think we hold on to longer than we should “just in case” – “Just in case” he really had a brain tumor all this time and wakes up one day and isn’t an ass and I’m stupid enough to take him back.  Which we all know, is NEVER going to happen. In my deleting I found a picture of myself from about 6/7 years ago, that at the time, I’m positive I hated it.  But I looked at it today, with kinder eyes and actually thought I looked pretty.  I think it’s really easy for us to get trapped in ideas, memories, they way things were, they would we would like them to be and forget to be here today.  I’m not going to lie, those pictures have been taunting me forever – I should do something with them, clean them up and make them meaningful, but really, you can only put so much lipstick on a pig – I mean, how many different angles do you really want to see flat Oklahoma landscape from? Here’s a secret – although it was a little bit hard to look at them all as I sorted and deleted last night, I woke up this morning feeling lighter.  It’s so funny how all this crap actually weighs you down.  Each thing I get rid of or let go of, is freeing and each thing is no more of less significant than each other.  Each step in letting go, is actually getting you back a piece of yourself.

So here’s you bi-weekly reminder, to live in the now, enjoy today and create meaningful moments and memories instead of just taking pictures of your life racing past your window at 70 miles an hour. Some of the best things happen in quiet moments, spontaneously and privately and there is no way to capture those in a picture. And for Pete’s sake, when there is a chance for a picture – take it, your kids will thank you when you’re gone –say nice things to yourself when you see your pictures – complement your hair, your smile, that shirt you really liked.  See yourself the way others do – beautiful and fun and smart and capable and worth loving.

 

 

Published by

Jennifer Foster

I am on quest to reclaim my life, one mile and one photo at a time. My goal is to share all the good and bad in a way that is both heart warming and humorous. Buckle in and enjoy my tales of travels and life's trials and tribulations. All described here in detail and photos because seriously, I can't make this shit up.

161 thoughts on “It’s ok to delete stuff – what I really wanted to say”

  1. I’m amazed, I have to admit. Rarely do I come across a blog that’s both equally educative and interesting, and let me tell you, you’ve hit the nail on the head. The issue is something which not enough men and women are speaking intelligently about. Now i’m very happy I stumbled across this in my search for something relating to this.

  2. Pretty element of content. I just stumbled upon your weblog and in accession capital to assert that I get actually enjoyed account your weblog posts. Anyway I will be subscribing to your feeds or even I achievement you get admission to consistently rapidly.

  3. A good selection of pieces might be made by hand and also subsistence latest financial environment dominates. Individualism is definitely weakly established on mother or father ethnics simply just mainly because may be communal modules. Unaltered mother or father ethnics now not be observed on industrialized states much like the Nation and even North the usa.

  4. Aw, this is an extremely good post. In thought I must set up writing such as this moreover – spending time and actual effort to create a great article… but what things can I say… I procrastinate alot and no means often get something carried out.

  5. This is actually intriguing, You’re a highly effective article writer. I have registered with your feed plus look forward to witnessing your personal phenomenal write-ups. Also, We have shared your webblog of our own web pages.

  6. Hey there! Would you mind if I share your blog with my twitter group? There’s a lot of folks that I think would really enjoy your content. Please let me know. Thanks

  7. Wow, fantastic blog format! How lengthy have you been running a blog for? you make running a blog glance easy. The overall glance of your website is great, let alone the content material!

  8. Hey I know this is off topic but I was wondering if you knew of any widgets I could add to my blog that automatically tweet my newest twitter updates. I’ve been looking for a plug-in like this for quite some time and was hoping maybe you would have some experience with something like this. Please let me know if you run into anything. I truly enjoy reading your blog and I look forward to your new updates.|

  9. Independance Immobilière – Agence Dakar Sénégal
    Av. Fadiga, Immeuble Lahad Mbacké
    BP 2975 Dakar
    +221 33 823 39 30

    Agence Immobilière Dakar

    I always spent my half an hour to read this blog’s posts everyday along with a cup of coffee.

  10. I like the helpful information you provide in your articles. I will bookmark your weblog and check once more right here frequently. I am reasonably certain I will learn many new stuff proper here! Best of luck for the next!

  11. Everyone loves what you guys tend to be up too. This kind of clever work and reporting! Keep up the great works guys I’ve added you guys to blogroll.|

  12. Nice place of duty. I study impressive by changed blogs everyday. It would all the time live stimulating to read subject matter substance starting different writers and observe a little small piece something from their blog.

  13. Excellent beat ! I wish to apprentice while you amend your web site, how could i subscribe for a blog site? The account helped me a acceptable deal. I had been tiny bit acquainted of this your broadcast offered bright clear idea|

  14. You really make it appear really easy with your presentation however I to find this topic to be really something which I believe I’d never understand. It seems too complex and extremely extensive for me. I’m looking ahead on your subsequent submit, I’ll try to get the cling of it!|

  15. My spouse and i got really joyous that Jordan managed to round up his web research with the precious recommendations he was given while using the weblog. It is now and again perplexing to simply possibly be releasing tips and tricks which usually the rest might have been trying to sell. We really understand we now have you to thank for this. Those illustrations you made, the straightforward website navigation, the relationships your site make it possible to promote – it is mostly wonderful, and it is making our son in addition to us understand this topic is thrilling, which is certainly wonderfully vital. Thanks for the whole thing!

  16. Thank you for your entire labor on this web site. My mom take interest in participating in investigations and it is obvious why. My partner and i learn all regarding the lively tactic you produce simple thoughts through your web site and in addition invigorate response from the others on the subject then our favorite princess is truly studying a whole lot. Take advantage of the rest of the year. You have been doing a superb job.

  17. I carry on listening to the newscast lecture about getting boundless online grant applications so I have been looking around for the top site to get one. Could you tell me please, where could i get some?

  18. I’m just commenting to let you be aware of of the extraordinary discovery my cousin’s daughter enjoyed going through your blog. She discovered lots of issues, most notably how it is like to have a very effective giving heart to have many others effortlessly gain knowledge of certain extremely tough matters. You really did more than my desires. Many thanks for displaying the helpful, healthy, educational and also easy thoughts on the topic to Gloria.

  19. Taxi moto line
    128 Rue la Boétie
    75008 Paris
    +33 6 51 612 712  

    Taxi moto paris

    Hi, I do think this is an excellent site. I stumbledupon it 😉 I’m
    going to come back once again since i have saved as a favorite it.
    Money and freedom is the best way to change, may you be rich
    and continue to guide others.

  20. Winston Salem Plumbing Pros, 111 N Chestnut St, Winston Salem, NC 27101 With every thing that seems to be developing inside this subject matter, all your viewpoints tend to be very radical. Having said that, I beg your pardon, but I do not give credence to your entire idea, all be it radical none the less. It looks to me that your remarks are not completely validated and in simple fact you are your self not even entirely convinced of your point. In any event I did appreciate reading it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *