I think the pizza guy is stalking me- also the Democrats

Now, I know what you are thinking, put down the remote, walk away from the TV and your DVR’d Dr. Phil and assorted reality shows, the pizza guy is not stalking you.

So I mean, it all started innocently enough.  Little by little, the local places that deliver food to my house all decided to carry Pepsi products and not my beloved Diet Coke.  The only one that did not go to the dark side was Domino’s .   So since they were the only place that would deliver Diet Coke and since they are often quick to deliver and since they created the brownie/chocolate chip cookie mash up thing, I went through a phase where I would order from there like once a week.

Often at lunch time, there would be this guy named Patrick that would deliver and would always seem to drag out the exchange of my money/signature for my Chicken Bacon Ranch sandwich/Diet Cokes.  He would be very chatty and always, what I felt, was too happy to see me.  ( I’ve learned a long time ago to always trust an oompa loompa vibe)

In an effort to save money/avoid Domino’s, I came to terms with my Diet Coke consumption and started buying a case at a time.  This really cut down on my need for emergency Domino’s deliveries.

Flash forward to a few weeks ago….  sometime between and 1 and 3 in the afternoon, when the sun is shining, I try to sit outside for anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours in a tank top working on my best tan ever.  So I’m outside early one day, like 11 ish and I see the Domino’s car pull into my parking lot and I think to myself, ah, “someone else needs Diet Coke”.  But the car just drives through my end of lot and keeps going.  Ok – a little weird, but not blog worthy yet.

Then I think it was last week or the week before, I ran out to get some stuff ( fine, it was McDonald’s  – the new sweet and spicy chicken tenders are tits and my new obsession) and I notice a car with the Domino’s thing on it, following me home.  I thought it was a funny co-incidence until, I pull in with the car right behind me.  I park in my usually spot and sit in the car for a second to check something on my phone before coming in and I see the guy, Patrick, get out of his car, which is parked across from my apartment. He gets out, looks at my building for a few moments, never delivers anything and gets back in his car and speeds away.  CREEPY.

So, then like an idiot, on Sunday, I really wanted a brownie/cookie thing – (ducking PMS) and so I ordered a pizza and brownie and lo and behold, guess who was delivering.  OMG – After waiting TWO hours for my pizza/cookie- it finally gets here.  He called me by name and again dragged out the interaction with way too many non- pizza comments/questions.

Do I think the pizza guy is dangerous? No.

Do I think this is weird? Yes.

Am I going to start hoarding Diet Coke and brownie mix so I never need to turn to Domino’s again? Yes

Also, the Democrats are stalking me.  They have been to my security locked building at least 4 times that I know of by the crap left on or under my door in the last month. Like, they specific buzz my apartment. They send me voting reminders in the mail like everyday. While I appreciate their commitment, their overzealousness is a super annoying, especially when you’ve got a pizza guy possibly stalking you.

Good thing tomorrow is election day!

 

Published by

Jennifer Foster

I am on quest to reclaim my life, one mile and one photo at a time. My goal is to share all the good and bad in a way that is both heart warming and humorous. Buckle in and enjoy my tales of travels and life's trials and tribulations. All described here in detail and photos because seriously, I can't make this shit up.

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