So I was dragging ass Monday afternoon and my throat was a little scratchy and I really wanted coffee. I put on shoes and a bra and headed out. ( I already was wearing pants and a sweatshirt, FYI – so I didn’t just leave in shoes and bra – sorry if that was unclear)
Now normally, I would just run through the drive thru at McDonald’s or Starbuck’s and order a latte or Caramel Mocha or something like that and then drive around to the window and some nice clerk would hand me a warm cup of deliciousness.
But in a effort to minimize my spending so that I can start saving for the greatest trip I will ever take, I decide to go to the Kwik Trip across the street for coffee. What a shit show!!! They had 8 kinds of coffee with these notes about “notes” in the coffee flavor and caffeine level. Then there were 4 different sizes of cups, 4 different flavors of creamer, like 12 different syrups, 4 or 5 different kinds of sweetener and like 4 different things you can sprinkle on top. And then if you turned around, there was whipped topping and chocolate and caramel drizzle. I mean, you could literally make like 234,532,983,193 different combinations with all that crap.
All I wanted was warm deliciousness. So I take a 24 oz cup, start off with a solid 1/2 – 3/4 inch of cinnamon hazelnut creamer in the bottom ( surprisingly, still not quite enough- my coffee was a little darker than I would have liked), then I filled the cup up like half way with hazelnut coffee ( allegedly low in caffeine) and the other half with a combination of French and Dark Roast ( high in caffeine). I take my super full cup over to put a lid on it and then I see all the syrups, so I add a couple pumps of hazelnut ( you know, to really bring the hazelnut flavor home) and 2 packets of sugar in the raw. After 3 tries, I finally successfully get the proper lid adhered to the cup and head to the check out.
With much anticipation, I make the 3 minute trip home, thinking this is going to be the best coffee ever. I pour it out of the paper cup into a fancy mug I imported from South Dakota that holds like 20 ounces and slammed what was left in the paper cup. I take a sip. It ok. Such a let down. I feel like I would have been better served mixing two packets of instant coffee with one packet of hot chocolate mix like I originally planned but thought it was good idea to leave the house.
Leaving the house is overrated. But at least I re-invested some lottery winnings while I was out. If anyone can turn 6 bucks into 20, it’s this girl. Keep your fingers crossed.