I had a big day yesterday. Transported a parrot cage, went to a birthday party for a three year old. Transported a pair of young chicks. ( baby chickens people and yes, I did seat belt their cage in and turn on the seat warmer) After successfully delivering the goods, I was home about 930 pm and called it a day with big plans to be oh so productive today.
So I woke up and got up about 9 and had a leisurely start to my day, had breakfast, Diet Coke and got ready to go pick up the groceries I had pre-ordered from the internet. I go to leave and my wallet is not in purse. I look around and I can’t find so I figure it’s got to be in the car, so I go to the car and no wallet, so I come back in, still no wallet, go back to the car a second time. I finally find it from the backseat wedged between the consul and the passenger seat. Crisis averted.
Now, this is just a quick trip to the grocery store, not even getting out of the car, I don’t comb my hair ( don’t worry- it’s in a “bun”), throw on my “good” sweatpants and a long top ( I skipped the bra, again, not getting out of the car) and don’t even give it a second thought. So I pull up to the store, turn my car off and call the magic number to summon the grocery fairy and within a few minutes, she arrives at my car with my diet coke, a bag of ice, shrimp that was an exceptional value and more fruit that I will throw out in two weeks when I have failed to eat it and it’s no longer good. She loads it all up, I press the button, the tailgate closes and she returns the store.
This is when things get good. I am now ready to come home to cook my cheap shrimp for salads for the week and I go to start my precious Navigator and she makes a horrible noise and does not start. I stop turning the key and then wait a second and try again. There isn’t a bad noise this time, it just wont turn over. I try one more time and then, I know what I have to do. So I make my monthly call to AAA and request a tow.
Tow people call me almost instantly to let me know that someone will be on the way, however, they are all far away and it will take a bit, however, they are going to send a battery guy to rule that out. Did I mention I’m still parked in the get your stuff and get the hell out spot? So I’m waiting for the battery guy to arrive when the girl from the store comes out to see what’s going on and I tell her my car is broken. Awesome! The battery guy gets there, I try to start the car and he says, oh, yeah, that sounds like your battery, so I get my hopes up. He hooks up the jump pack and the car won’t start. Not even once out of the four times he had me try. So he’s like yeah, you’ve got to be towed. ( Thanks Captain Obvious)
I sit there about another 25-30 minutes waiting for the tow guy and finally he arrives. He’s nice, agrees its bad and gets to work on how he’s going to get it on the truck. So I say to him, “Can I just ride home in the car like they do in that Tom Cruise movie?” – (my sister later reminded me it was called Knight and Day) and he said, although it is legal in Wisconsin, it was against their company policy.
So I’m watching him get my car on the tow truck and I see two little kids watching very interestedly and their dad giving them a play-by-play. You’re welcome father of the year for the free entertainment. Would it have killed him to give me a sympathetic nod? While my car is getting on the truck, the tow truck was blocking in these two older ladies and they were so nice and we were chatting it up. For some reason, they had no interest in purchasing my vehicle, but the one looks at me and goes, “now how are you going to get home?” Her concern was quite sweet actually.
Just a reminder in case you forgot, all this time, there is a bag of ice in the back of my car.
I rode home with the really nice lumberjackish tow truck driver and he delivered both me and my car safely home. Dare I say it, he might have even parked it better than I can when it’s running. My ice was not a total loss and the other groceries were just fine. Again, really glad I wore my good sweatpants today. Just wish I would’ve slapped on a bra. And maybe some fresh deodorant. And mascara. And lip gloss…..
Tomorrow, I will have it towed to get fixed. I don’t know exactly what is wrong, but I suspect either the starter or the timing belt. ( I will be setting up a gofundme soon – just kidding) The problem is, I’m obviously running out of AAA service calls, lucky for me, I have multiple roadside assistant plans, so I’m covered for tomorrow. It’s great not having a car payment, but seriously, this is getting old.